I was about 6 months pregnant when the father of my child took me to a party. It was there that I met a woman that would become a very important person in my life. At first I really didn’t like her as she kept taking my boyfriend to the bathroom to get him high and not sharing with me. I was a young, immature 17 with jealousy and envy in control. I am not sure how this friendship grew and transpired as my memory is a bit fogged.
I remember she moved to her own apartment and my boyfriend, me and our new daughter moved into her sister’s home. It was there that a friendship began. Her daughter was about 3 months older than mine and we spent countless night’s awake playing rummy only to find the sunshine and sleepy eyes when our children awoke. We would drag through the day in a daze together. Over the course of 5 years we experienced the pits of hell and the bond of the strongest friendship I had ever had. We hated and loved one another like no one else.
I remember when she was pregnant with her second daughter I told her I’ll be her dad. She will have blue eyes (like me) and red hair (like you). It was a self fulfilling prophecy because that beautiful girl was born just as I had predicted and once she could form words it was me who was called dad. This is a special relationship for me and I love this girl with all my heart. Most women cannot say they know how it feels when a child turns its head up with bright sincere eyes and says daddy the first time. I can.
It wasn’t always sunshine and roses for us but one thing is for certain… We could always count on one another. We spent months in motels with our 3 children struggling to pay the next nights bill. We lived together, apart and with others. She was my dealer, I was hers and we dealt together. Near the end of the using for us I remember using drug money to pay for her treatment. It was ironic that the fruits of my illegal occupation could provide the opportunity for her to regain her life. When I got clean and moved to my first apartment it was her who came and provided some necessities to begin my new life.
I must say that since taking the drugs from our relationship it hasn’t been what it once was but the memories, the confidence, that if I ever needed someone she would be there is enough.
The coincidences are crazy. I met a man whom I now share my life with. He has the most amazing family who has lifetime friends that share in many events and activities with us. This friend I have been telling you about is connected. Her father was raised with this group of friends. The have shared marriage, fun, and even funerals together. I am blessed to know her father in another setting. It is my God’s will that I am able to show this man that I am more than I ever was.
Later I came into this great job and over time began to build relationships with people. This one woman in particular I have grown quite close to. We shared our lives. She shared about her mom, her brother, her step siblings. I shared about being an addict, my friend and her children. One Saturday when we working in the park together for work she said hey, there’s my mom and what do I see. My friend’s dad and his wife. The people we had shared about were the same people. The connection we found was all part of the connection created when I was but 17.
For some reason this woman, these kids and I are supposed to share our journey. It is not a relationship with just one woman but a relationship with her entire family. I haven’t mentioned that her mother was my mother. When we were homeless, living in poverty, with out transportation her mother always ensured I and my daughter had that which she provided for her daughter and grandchildren. Through out my recovery I have attempted to repay this debt, to amend that which happened. I attempt to be kind and generous to strangers for I know what this woman’s kindness meant to me.
Well this is but a moment of memories. As I type these words I am flooded with the faces and smiles of the lives we impacted together. I remember the jokes and the laughter, the slaps and the tears. I remember the freedom to be afraid with this friend. I wasn’t required to be strong. She knew me when I was just (insert boyfriends name) old lady, to the progression of becoming my own person with my own reputation. And today she knows me as a successful woman who has overcome the challenges of addiction.
Not only that but I have been blessed to know her, to know her story, to share her journey… to love, her.
posted by freedom14 @ 8:23 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home